Darryl Silverstein

[00:00:00] Speaker A: Foreign. [00:00:17] Speaker B: Well, hi there again, family and friends. Welcome back to Awareness, the podcast. This is where we explore the stories that shape who we are and the perspectives that help us better understand ourselves and one another. We're all about fostering a more compassionate, empathetic, and accepting society. Yours truly, Rob Daniels here. And don't forget to like and subscribe to this podcast wherever you get your podcast. That would certainly mean a lot, especially if you enjoy the conversation on mental health. We have all kinds of topics that we cover here to try and break the stigma one story at a time. And today's episode. Episode is certainly a personal one for me. I'm reconnecting with a longtime friend, Daryl Silverstein. We grew up playing baseball together, and even at such a young age, I mean, Daryl showed so much resilience. And I remember this specifically on the field. I may have not said it often, maybe because back then, mental health was. It was more stigmatized when I was a kid or I just didn't know how to express my feelings toward it, and it was just bottled up more. But now that I'm an adult, I know how to pass that on to him and say how much I respected him for it, even though it was a lot quieter back then. And we'll get to that in, in a little bit. But he. He never let these certain situations get to him, the. The personal obstacles that he had to go through. And the major one for him is being blind in one eye. Okay. So he never let being blind in one eye define him or limit what he believed was possible. And years later, Darrell has faced an even greater challenge when he was diagnosed with brain cancer in his 40s. And what stands out most isn't just what he. He went through, but how he went through it with honesty, gratitude, and a commitment to becoming the best version of himself, regardless of what he was experiencing. So this conversation is certainly going to be about resilience. If you can relate to that, even if you can't, we'd love to inspire you here today. It's also going to be about perspective and the unseen battles that so many people carry. So I'm grateful to have Daryl here to share his story. Thank you so much for doing this today, Darrell. [00:02:53] Speaker A: My pleasure. Thanks for having me. It's great to see you. It's always great to see you. And the last time I. You and I were together was when you released your book. [00:03:03] Speaker B: Yes. [00:03:04] Speaker A: So I'm. I'm happy to. To be here and happy to see you. [00:03:08] Speaker B: Yeah. Thanks for that. Back in 2021, beyond the mic, a self help and memoir. So thank you for supporting. That means a lot. So for those hearing your story. Sure. For the first time, how would you describe yourself growing up? [00:03:26] Speaker A: A very driven and motivated person. I think that baseball was the best outlet. Like most kids have something, whether it's arts, whether it's music or sport, there's some type of outlet. I was lucky enough to have baseball as my old only because my dad was a big baseball fan. Never played. My brother, my older brother played, but not at a high level. But it was just the early 90s. I was born in 83, so we went to Cooperstown in 91 and I just absolutely fell in love with the sport. And my dad was teaching me so much about the history of baseball and then little bits about the Canadian history of baseball. And then I just started aligning things and leaving that trip to Cooperstown, I was already playing baseball. I'm like, okay, this is something I really want to do. Fast forward 93, in our community, we had rep baseball made that rep team, continued on. But to answer your question, what defined my childhood is at the age of 13, I woke up one morning blind in my left eye. And for most people I, I, it would, it would, it's a tragic event, right? It's a childhood trauma. And you know, they did surgery on it and I am blind in my left eye. And the doctors had said, you know, you can't have any serious blow to the head. You can't have any, you can't, you're gonna have to stop playing baseball. And I went for a long drive with my dad after a long chat with my parents and my dad had said to me, and we were in Thornhill, just north of Toronto, and we just kept going north. And the conversation was, it's easy to give up. That's the easy thing to do. But you have to start setting goals for yourself. And what are those goals going to be? You don't have to have them ready for me today. But is it to get back on the baseball field? Is it to be I was a catcher. Is it to still to catch? If that is it, if that's the goal, how are you going to achieve that success? How are we going to work on that? [00:05:31] Speaker B: Right. [00:05:32] Speaker A: The hard thing to do is to say, all right, I'm going to keep going. I'm going to, yeah, that's my goal. And the ultimate goal was to be a major leaguer, to be the first blind major leaguer. That was the ultimate goal. And in. So this was 1996, 1996. We didn't quite have the gear or the luxury of what young athletes do today with teas and nets and just the defensive equipment to work on my defense. And my dad was a very big influence by saying, all right, you know, let's take socks, and you're gonna start blocking baseballs. You may not be the best hitter because you're blind and left eye, and I'm a righty batter, so let's. Let's try to work on your defense. And it was blocking. It was working on my arm, and it just. Well, while you're in high school, next level, because I was in eighth grade at the time. You know, people have new interests, and I just kept going. And people were falling out of baseball, and I kept going. And I remember you went to Graceland, am I right? [00:06:35] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah, that was where I went to college. It was the only. Well, it was. Yeah, it was a. It was an NAIA school. Pretty much the only way I could get into the US to experience college ball in the US Was. Was not on a full scholarship, but it was on. It was on partial. You know, I was just happy enough that they invested a little bit in me. I was just a part of the team, and that was. It was cool. And just wanting to experience college ball in the US as sort of like the last hurrah of. Of, you know, playing competitively. But you did yourself as well playing in Brock. Brock and stuff. [00:07:13] Speaker A: And just along that journey while. Yeah, I was motivated to just be the absolute best I could be. Cause I knew that everybody had two eyes, everybody had a functional body. I didn't have that luxury. So when it came time to have practice and it's just. Let's run a poll. I had to be first when it was home, the first I had to do. And I was never a fast guy, but there were things that I could control. And the big thing was my attitude and my effort. So I think that a lot of people would say I was there, favorite teammate, and as a catcher, always willing to catch bullpens. But it was also my attitude. If I'm. If I wasn't gonna play that day, I wasn't gonna talk about it. [00:07:56] Speaker B: Yeah. Speaking of your good attitude, I mean, that's what I wanted to get to next. Was your role, your role with sports. What role did sports and baseball specifically play in shaping your mindset? [00:08:08] Speaker A: Early on, it shaped the absolute person that I am today. Yeah, I can't draw enough alignment between the sport of baseball and my life or life in General. Because nobody is perfect. And to be a baseball player, you're never going to have a day where you may have days where you go three for three and four. Four. And you may have days where you absolutely have your best stuff on the mound and your best pitch could be hit for a home run and, and your worst pitch could strike somebody out, or you can just barrel up and hit three line drives to the outfield and they're all going to be caught. And that's baseball. But that's also life. All I know is when I show up, I'm going to give it my all. Just like every day when I wake up and my, my feet get on the ground, I'm going to give my all. And when my ear hits the pillow and it's time to go to sleep, hopefully I can look back on the day and say, all right, I was a great dad, I was a great husband, I was a great coach or, or a motivator. That's the goal. But baseball, if that, if this sport didn't exist, I would be a completely different person. That is for sure. [00:09:16] Speaker B: Yeah. So when it comes to the going back to being blind in one eye and, you know, I was, I was, I was very shy to sort of approach you about that during playing years, when we played also, I believe when we played competitively, Thornhill Reds, a long time ago. This is going back 20, 20 some odd years ago, or maybe, maybe even more. Yeah. And you know, it. I just, I. I just respected you for it. Anytime I, like, heard that or when I found that out somehow, I was like, wow, like, that's this. And he's. [00:09:53] Speaker A: But there were some bullies. There was, There were some bullies. There was definitely some bullies on the ball field. And they would. The fit. There was, There was a time that I remember, I remember stepping in one of my very first games playing senior baseball, and by that point I'd already. Everybody knew that I was the blind baseball player. And first pitch went behind me. Second pitch was at my ankles. I called time and I just looked at the pitcher and the pitcher went, it's my coach. And you know, after the game, you shake hands. He's like, oh, I wanted to see the blind kid dance. And I was probably in my mid-20s at the time, but that. You're not going to get a reaction from me. I'm just not going to be that kind of person. I'm going to have class and all the way through and decadence, dignity. [00:10:36] Speaker B: Yeah, absolutely. [00:10:38] Speaker A: The game is still, to me, a Gentleman's game. [00:10:40] Speaker B: Yeah. And you're resilient and you just, you know that you're better than that. It's sometimes being non responsive is the best way to go about it. [00:10:51] Speaker A: And yeah, you may not remember things, but I, I do because there would certainly be times where, whether it be yourself or a teammate and, and you're just having a bad day and I, my line was always, heck, let's, let's see how well I do with one eye. And I just get a joke, just have a little laugh, you know, I. [00:11:11] Speaker B: Think I remember you saying that once in a while when you're in the, in the cage or like in the dugout and you'd walk by and you're on going to the on deck circle. [00:11:18] Speaker A: I'm gonna be a top guy all day. I'm gonna be, as a coach, I'm always going to be the motivator to, to everybody. I don't give up. I want them. I want to see everybody succeed because if everybody around me succeeds, I know I can succeed. And because I have a degenerative disease in my left eye, I'm very big on seeing smiles, I'm very big on seeing positivity. Because, Rob, if me and you get into an argument today and I go blind on my eye tomorrow morning, I don't want the last image of me and you to have a frown on your face. So I want everything, I want our last note together or our last time together to always be positive. [00:11:57] Speaker B: But in regards to your awareness, because this show is called awareness and I'm very interested in your awareness that you may have had or maybe you just can't remember, which is simply okay. I don't, I don't judge you in the sense of when you were a kid or you said it was 13 when this happened. Can you remember the awareness, what it felt like and what it was like to see with both eyes before it happened? Do you still know what it's like or is it just. This is automatic now and you don't have the, the really the, the vivid memory of what it is like to see with two eyes. [00:12:34] Speaker A: I mean, I'm 42. I, I've lived most of my life now with vision and just one eye. So unfortunately I don't remember, but I can remember the emotion. I remember vividly being in the doctor's office and them looking in my eye and my mom being there with me and the doctor saying, hannah, can I talk to you for a second? And they just left the door open just this much and now my sense of awareness is like, I know this isn't good. I could tell by the body language even as a early young teenager. And all I can hear him say is, I've never seen anything like this before. You got to take him to the hospital right now. I going to call Toronto Western. There's going to be somebody there waiting for you. And all I could think of to talk about awareness was not so much about my health was, am I going to play baseball? Because this was February. Am I going to be able to play baseball this summer? Is that going to be a thing? Are we going to be okay? Is technology good enough? They took me to the hospital, they said, you're going to have to wait another day. And then they did the emergency surgery on me. I knew that life was going to change. I didn't know how it was going to make me as a person now as a dad, it helps shape me to be positive and just see how my kids are as they went through the age of 13. I've got a 16 year old and a 15 year old. They're soon about to be 17 and 16. But I wanted to make sure that they were aware of if they were working with somebody who has a disability or. Because you were talking about that earlier, there was a stigma. You were the blind kid. That's just how it was. And to talk about it openly was a sense of weakness. I never felt that way. I was always open, I was never shy to talk about my disability. And I felt that that crafted who I was. And now in how society has changed, it's. It's okay to talk about it. I was very open about it. I, I like to have a little bit of comedy around things. So in the summer of 2001, when the catchers baseball helmets became a thing, I got mine painted to be a Cyclops because somebody had once called me a cyclops. And I thought, oh, you know what? I'm gonna get this mask paint as a cyclops, still have it in our basement. So to be aware, I'm very aware and emotionally hurt because I knew that life for me was different. I still drive. I still, I mean, do I. I stub my toe more than anybody else in the world. But to translate that into baseball, I love to get hit by pitch. I found a way to get on base every time and I just use it to my advantage as much as I could. [00:15:15] Speaker B: Yeah, exactly. Well, from one diagnosis to the other, this is the one that is more recent. Through your 40s, we're talking about brain Cancer. And before your cancer diagnosis, what did your life look like? Can you describe that? [00:15:38] Speaker A: Sure. I mean, to talk about awareness, it was as great. Not to say it's not now, but as normal as it was. [00:15:46] Speaker B: Right. [00:15:47] Speaker A: I have two sons and a wife coaching baseball at the time, driving my Elvis to all of his baseball. My little guy golfing and playing music. My wife and I doing everything together. There was no change. We were just doing that, that, that, that, that, the parenting life. That's just what we did. That, you know, work's done, on to the next thing. That was life. [00:16:12] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:16:14] Speaker A: In June of 2023, I had a massive, massive seizure out of nowhere. And I was healthy. And it translated into there being a tumor on my brain, which, which we didn't know. It took a little bit of time to get an MRI and took time for a diagnosis. And the idea at the time was we can either keep it in and see what happens or take it out. And, and the best decision was to take it out and went through extensive radiation and chemotherapy. And I do remember what life was like beforehand. It was, it, it was difficult because I wasn't able to drive for a long time. Still not favorable to drive on the highways, but I do on occasion. But boy, does it put things into perspective. [00:17:05] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:17:05] Speaker A: Because I really don't sweat the small things. I, I thought I was chill before when I was just, just blind in one eye. [00:17:14] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:17:14] Speaker A: I, I, I think I've got Teflon skin now, that's for sure. And, and way more positive and way more happier because we just get one, one chance at this. [00:17:26] Speaker B: So let's just make the best of it and. Exactly. And you have to, I mean, so it was, it's called a brain tumor, right? [00:17:36] Speaker A: Yes, yes. [00:17:37] Speaker B: Yeah. And this is where it's such a, it's a close story to my heart because my cousin, right before the pandemic, she had that, and she unfortunately passed away. She was in the Dominican Republic, though, and she was in her 40s. And they, and they, she had a brain tumor. And from my understanding, had some of the best doctors working on her in the Dominican Republic. She was married to Dominican fellow, but, you know, she just said I couldn't learn. [00:18:05] Speaker A: It's, it's. The brain is so big and there's so many specialists. There's ones that focus on the spine, the frontal lobes, the side lobes. It's just what, what happens where you get it. But the seizure that I had and the tumor were not together as I, as weird and ironic as that is, but I'm lucky that they caught it. I'm lucky that they took it out. I'm just to, to even sometimes think back to say, like, I went through extensive radiation. That was tough. [00:18:39] Speaker B: Absolutely. It's. It's really. It's exhausting I think from my understanding. Right too. Like, it's just. You're putting. It's putting your body through a lot of. I don't know what the word is. It's just your ear. You feel like you've probably run a marathon after you get through something like that because of how vigorous. [00:18:59] Speaker A: Every day for a number of months. Chemotherapy was 10 months. But I've got a great team and what I mean by team. I've got the most supportive and wonderful and beautiful wife that takes care of me every single moment. Not just every single day, every single moment. Two lovely, handsome, great boys that just love and adore me, that will take care of me. I've got a dad, a brother in law and a sister in law that will drive me to doctor's appointments and MRIs when I need to. Uncles and aunts that take phone calls from me, friends that are consistently there for me. I've got a hypnotist named Luke who works with me every single week to get my mind right. Because when you go through brain cancer that there's heart attacks or strokes, there's cancers, all. Everything is bad. But I. Because it's my mind. I wanted to get my mind right and I didn't want to be negative. I don't want negativity at all. I don't want to be down. You get some. I got some bad news dealt to me and I want to make sure that every week is good. And Luke, he's my secret weapon. He gets me and my mind right every week we chat and every week he puts me in. In my mind where it needs to be. [00:20:15] Speaker B: So, yeah, that's fantastic. I mean, that's the way you want to go is. Is turn your negatives into a positive as much as. As much as you can. How did your perspective then on. On life change in those early days after hearing the news though? [00:20:34] Speaker A: So you obviously go through that is, you know, fair. What's fair? Not fair. Nothing's fair. It's not fair. Why me? That's normal. And I think that if you don't go through those phases of that, then you're just not human. You have to put things into that perspective. But then you realize that. So I'm not. I wouldn't say I'm the most overly religious person by any means. But I do know that God's gonna give me what I can handle and I'm still battling. And then I decided that just like that conversation with my dad all those years ago about my eye. The easy thing to do is to be negative. The hard thing to do is to be positive. And then there's platforms like this where I get to connect with you once again. And you're such a lovely person and you've persevered, overcome so much and hopefully there's people in your audience that could hear that there's a person here that overcame brain cancer, went back to coach. So that summer I coached, I've been, I'm going to be entering my fifth Maccabi Games. That summer that I came back, we got a silver medal. My rep team that I coached, the elite team that I coach that year lost in the finals of the YSPAs. I was baseball Canada coach of the year and Ontario baseball coach the year. So I'm done coaching there. Like that's the best you could do. And I now have the lovely, just the best team of humans and at Makabi that I can work with. And this year the Toronto is hosting it. So I'm still able to do it. So I'm not giving up. I have that mentality of you can't make the best of. [00:22:16] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. [00:22:17] Speaker A: And you know what, the way my perspective is on it now, when you get some of the worst news possible, what are you going to do? Are you just going to sit on the couch and, and be lazy and just let that your back soak into your couch or you got to get your shoes on, go to the gym, eat healthy, listen to the protocols. There's a lot of people that choose not to do chemotherapy and radiation and I respect everybody's decision, but I thought, you know what, I'm just going to do it. And my wife Amy made this great idea at the time. Let's go for the earliest radiation appointment we can. This way it's like you're going to work, you wake up, put your pants on, go to the hospital, get radiation, go get chemotherapy, go and obviously stop the rest of the day, the next day, get in there and it's a grind to get in there. And Luke, my, my hypnotist made it seem like every day I was going into radiation, it was like an MMA fight. So I would dress in a zip up hoodie and I had my pants on and then I would take the pants off, unzip, get in there and they put you on this, like, gurney, they put a mask on you and they zap you. I was in there for a long time, almost two hours every single day. And then. And then chemotherapy. But you're not going to beat me. I was like, okay. And there were some days where you're, you're, you're. It's tough. Yeah, you just keep going. You just, there's, there's just keep going. And I look back now and I go, I can't believe I did it. [00:23:51] Speaker B: So when you, when you. Yeah, absolutely. You're resilient, what, when you say it was tough, what was the most challenging part of the treatment journey for you specifically? Was it physically? Something physically, mentally. [00:24:05] Speaker A: Yeah, that's a great question. That, that is a term that. It was both. It was mentally and physically exhausting. But that's where a strong mind comes in. They. If it's okay to tell you a story. They, they had told me that not many people pass. I was on a trial and the hospital had this number 15. I kept on saying, what's that? Number 15? [00:24:32] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:24:32] Speaker A: Because there are some days like, so you have to think that you're going into Bruce Wayne's cave at the hospital. Like you're in this own wing all. It's almost like Stranger Things. It's just. Just small little TVs everywhere. Two double doors all the way down, concrete cave. And it's only because 15% of the people actually pass through this trial because of how rigorous it is. And it was a mental test. And. Yeah. Did I cry many days? I think I cried every day. But what the driving factor is this, this life. Beautiful blue sky days with the grass as green as it is, watching daytime baseball. That's what's to live for. To see my boys grow up, to see my beautiful wife, to see you, you know, and all the great, all my friends, successes, that's to live for. So when you're going through it, you're selfishly doing it for you, but you're selfishly doing it to show the next person, hey, I can do this too. I can overcome this type of adversity. You know, Darrell can do it. I can do it. [00:25:34] Speaker B: So when you, when you speak about these days that you would cry, and that's not necessarily a bad thing because it's. You're just releasing your feelings. And sometimes, sometimes we as humans were just so overcome by emotion and feelings that it just happens. And you should totally feel your feelings. I'm all for that. So when that was happening, can you recall? Sure. Were there moments when this was fear or doubt that it felt overwhelming. And how did you work through? [00:26:09] Speaker A: I, I think. No, I know. I think the wrong word would be think. I know how it felt. So when, when it would happen is you're done radiation. They're done with you. It's exhausting. You put back on your clothes, like you're just, you're just getting unchanged and change in front of everybody. And then there's a walk through a very short hallway at the hospital and you see the next person who's going in and it's a, it's, it's just like you lock eyes, they see what you've just gone through. Now they know what you're going through. And it's a lonely walk. It's a lonely walk. And you go. And then the two double doors open. And I would see the majority, if not every single time. My wife Amy, you know, occasionally be my brother in law, Stephen, or my dad or my aunt, and they were there. And then you just sit and, and it's just like you cry because this, I just went through 90 minutes, if not longer, 120 minutes of in an MRI machine with a mask on where you can't even touch your lips because the mask is so tight and it's locked in and you're shackled in because you can't have any movements. And then they zap you. So it's just like, I can't believe I just went through this. And it's, thank you, sir. Can I have another tomorrow? I'll be right back. Right back here. 6:30 in the morning. And it's just, it's overwhelming. So it's mentally, you're exhausted at that point. And it's like, all right, get me in the car. Let's get chemotherapy done. Let's get in the car and get ready to come back tomorrow. So that was the emotional part. There was never, I don't want to do this tomorrow. It was all right, I'm going to do this tomorrow. That's my job. Going back to your comment about baseball, it's like going 0 for 3 and being in the biggest slump ever and just knowing if I just change something around, I can get on base now that, that was the mentality took in there. [00:28:08] Speaker B: Yeah, good. [00:28:09] Speaker A: This was my fight. This was my fight. It was my MMA fight. [00:28:13] Speaker B: What or who became your greatest source of strength during that time? [00:28:19] Speaker A: Oh, it's my immediate family. It's looking at my two boys and my beautiful wife every day and them going, like, you could do this you're good. You know, you could. Like you're sleeping on the couch. What can I do? That. That is the source, that is the strength. We are all lucky that, that the world put us all together to meet. Because if I didn't have Amy as the leader of getting me by this, I don't know where I would be. It. This, it's all compliments to her. She was able to just help me out through everything. She was able to motivate the boys to get me mentally ready. And my dad was a huge source of it. My, My friends were a huge source of it. My brother in law, my sister in law were huge sources of it. My aunt was a huge source for it. My uncles were huge sources of it. I was coaching at the time. The kids wanted me back on the field. That's what, that's what I, that's what I did it for. But mainly my wife and my boys. That, that, this, this. I, I had things I needed to see. I had, I think at the time, boy, I think Wyatt was just finishing the, the ninth grade and Minky was just finishing up the eighth grade. Lots. Like there's lots. I just need to. Or no, my. Maybe I was wrong on that, but maybe Miki was just. Yeah, the ninth grade and eighth, ninth grade, eighth grade. But I needed to see it all happen. I need, I, I need to be back up and running and. All right, let's just keep going like that. That was it. That was mentality. [00:30:00] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah, for sure. And it makes total sense. And that's your, you know, that's. Those are your people, your, you know, your immediate family, obviously, first and foremost. And what do they say behind every great man is an even greater woman or something? I don't know. Right. So, yeah, I'm glad you had that amazing support. You talk about this being your MMA fight, the, the going through chemo. How did that experience redefine what strong strength means to you? [00:30:35] Speaker A: I didn't know I had the strength. Yeah, I think that's the, the most resilient thing I can say. I, I thought I knew who I was as a person at the time of I'm blinding one eye, put it behind me. I just live a normal life. I didn't know that I had this. I didn't know I had this desire to fight. I didn't know that I had this determination inside of me. I didn't know that I had this fight. I didn't know I could be cornered like this. I didn't know that I could overcome this terrible news of, hey, it's brain cancer and we're gonna have to operate on you. You're gonna have a different look. We're gonna have to open up your head. Amongst other things, right? You'd have to go through radiation, extensive radiation. You're going to lose your hair, you're going to go through chemotherapy, you're going to lose your hair. There's going to be changes to your skin. Like, there's all these things that happen. I didn't know I had that resiliency me, but everybody does. It's just, you have to find it. And some people are. They'll say, like, I'm not. I'm okay with the way I am. I don't have that button. I think that in when God made this body, there's no like, I give up button. It's just, I gotta keep going. That's. That's all I have. So I. But I didn't know I had it in me until it's all done. The last day of radiation was done. I kept going, doing chemotherapy for months afterwards. And just looking back on. Holy cow, I can't believe I accomplished that. And now I want to tell people that, yeah, there's going to be days where you get. There's going to be days where it's just tough. [00:32:22] Speaker B: It's just. [00:32:22] Speaker A: Just tough days. You know, some days we just wake up. We're human, just like dogs and cats wake up, I'm sure, having tough days. But just be resilient. Because the one thing I have learned is every day we wake up, there's an opportunity for something great to happen. So we don't wake up is when we don't know. That's. And then I. Hopefully they look back and they go, there was a really great guy. He was a motivator. He loved seeing people succeed. He put everybody before him. But I'm not there yet. I still have a lot of fight to go. [00:32:54] Speaker B: Yeah, exactly. You. You hit the nail on the head with that. I'm interested. You got me thinking about just the brain because I'm. And I'm sure with going through this, you are probably just a huge fan of whatever's good for the brain. You want to. You're very aware of that now more than ever, probably. You just want to, you know, make it as healthy as possible. But just the physical part of it, because you had to be operated on, right? Like you had it. Like, did you. Did you want to take a look at that? Did you have the curiosity to ask your surgeon that you wanted to see anything afterwards, or were you just like, no, not for me. Or did they take. [00:33:36] Speaker A: There's some things I don't want to know still that Amy will manage, which I think is fair. There's only. I'm not done blocking it up. I'm very aware of trials and I'm very aware of what's happening medically, especially with myself. We just saw the surgeon today. We saw the oncologist last week. We saw the fellow two weeks ago. I've got a stroke, doctor. I've got a headache, doctor. I've got many, many, many, many, many different doctors. [00:34:12] Speaker B: All of this, all of this also must have taken away from your. Just your livelihood. Like, what have you done with your work? Your everything. Like, everything's had to be put on pause, right? [00:34:24] Speaker A: It was. [00:34:25] Speaker B: Yeah, it was for a long time. [00:34:27] Speaker A: So the surgery happened in September of 2023, and I went back to work in January of 2024. It was a. It was not easy during that time, but I wanted to push myself originally. The. The start date for me was going to be July 2024, to come back to work and rehabilitation and working with the doctors and working with our team. I felt that I was good enough around this time, like Christmas time, 2023, to try and get back to work in 2024, which I did. The best thing is work. It's a great distraction during the day. [00:35:06] Speaker B: Right. [00:35:07] Speaker A: Because your mind does waver and, you know, thoughts do come to your head. [00:35:11] Speaker B: Thoughts, yeah. [00:35:12] Speaker A: But I would like to think that before this, I was healthy, but I am incredibly healthy now. I do not eat any sugars whatsoever. I don't drink any alcohol whatsoever. So I very much limit if I have any carbs. It's very limited. I'm on a. I would say a very strict, like, fruits and vegetable diet. I do meat, but no red meats. And that's all based on the protocol that the dietitian gave me after surgery leading into surgery. To answer your question, the doctor did say, like, look, you're going in for brain cancer surgery. Here's what can happen. You know, I met with a number of doctors beforehand, and a lot of the ones that we consulted with in the US had said, you got to get this thing out. We need to know what it is. We need to know if it's cancer. Can't treat it unless we know if it's cancer. If it's not cancer, we. There's other things you can do, but we need to know what it is so they can't Just go in, sound like it's on your arm. They can just stick a needle in, take a biopsy. They have to cut it out. So we found a great doctor. He's one of the salt of the earth gentlemen you'll ever meet with the most tremendous bedside manner you could ever have. His name is Dr. Das, a wonderful, wonderful man at a St. Mike's Hospital. [00:36:40] Speaker B: Okay. Yep. [00:36:41] Speaker A: Took it out and got the diagnosis from the pathologist and oncologist and radiation oncologist from Sunnybrook. [00:36:49] Speaker B: And. [00:36:50] Speaker A: All right. Things are going to change. So this is the. This is what we're gonna do. We're gonna get you into chemotherapy next week, radiation next week. It's like, you know, like, it's fast. Like everything happened really fast. So I worked up until. I literally worked up until the surgery happened as well. [00:37:09] Speaker B: So whatever. Like, they took out. Did. Did they. Are they. Did you give them permission to keep that for research purposes? I guess. [00:37:20] Speaker A: Yeah. So for what I know it's got. It goes around and around and around like that. There. There is techniques that, that they have, and it goes to multiple different labs, and the labs all take a look at it. But that's wherever it is now. [00:37:36] Speaker B: It's somewhere. [00:37:37] Speaker A: It's not here, that's for sure. Okay. But I, I. As far as I know, I'm sure some. I'm sure a lot of eyes have been on it, that's for sure. [00:37:48] Speaker B: But, yeah, it could help out for others in the future. Right. And that's what it's all about. [00:37:51] Speaker A: As far as I know that. Yeah. [00:37:53] Speaker B: As far as I know. [00:37:53] Speaker A: Yeah. People. There are many different places. I've seen it. Many different labs. I've seen it. [00:37:58] Speaker B: And what lessons did this journey teach you about gratitude, presence, or awareness? [00:38:06] Speaker A: Live in the now. Enjoy life. Just enjoy life. [00:38:13] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:38:13] Speaker A: You know, I'm not saying you need to buy the Ferrari if you can't afford it. [00:38:19] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:38:19] Speaker A: Or buy the shirt if you can't afford it. It's not about that chances, you know, have some fun. Take a risk. Go on a trip with somebody you love if there's no way that you love. Maybe go talk to somebody. Have great relationships with friends. Have a friend, you know, enjoy time with other people. Make memories. Make memories of yourself with other people. Become a memory for other people. Do great things because we didn't ask to be here, but let's make the best time while we're here. And the other thing that I've learned is I tell everybody that I love them, because I do. I love everybody. Life's too short to not. To not tell them that you love them. [00:38:59] Speaker B: There's too much hate in the world. Why? Just. Just love. Why. Why do we. We're all, you know, um, so I. [00:39:06] Speaker A: Don'T care what color race people are, let's just love each other. And as corny as it sounds, and I know you've got a great DJ music background, but Ringo Starr said, peace and love and why can't we just have peace and love? The world would be so much better. So I do love everybody. I love the time I spend with people. I admire it, I cherish it. And I hope that I'm decently funny with them and I create a good memory for them. And that's. That's the best thing that I've learned. And to have conversations like this because they are cathartic. You know, I was at Virgin today. It wasn't the best of days, that's for sure. But then I wanted to make sure that I was going to show up for you like it was a game. Right? Got to get ready, got to prepare, gotta, you know, stretch in a way, get my mind right so that I could deliver excellent for you today. And I didn't want to have my time at the surgeon change how I would be or my cadence to speak to you. I wanted to give you my 100 without any errors. [00:40:10] Speaker B: I appreciate that, but no pressure for sure, because I know, I'm very aware of that you've gone through hell and back, so, you know, so just that. [00:40:20] Speaker A: You'Re very good on one. On one. [00:40:22] Speaker B: It's not. Thank God. This isn't a group setting. No, it's. Listen, I've always admired your positive outlook. Despite the trials and the tribulations and your world being turned upside down at times, you've managed to stay quite grounded and resilient. And again, just very proud of you for doing that. And you deserve all the credit in the world for doing that. I always admired how you played on the baseball field and positive attitude. It had a. Quite a big impact on me. So I, I'm very fond of, of, you know, all the baseball memories. Just the person you are. And lastly, I'd want to know what, what you would want to say. Like, what would, what would you say to someone who is currently facing a serious health battle or unseen, strong or unseen struggle? Let's say, what would you say to them? [00:41:20] Speaker A: Don't feel that you're targeted. Don't feel that. That. That something bad happened. For some reason it's happened. And now the story is about how you're going to overcome it. That's. That's the best part of the story. Not that an ailment or a sickness or a death or a loss of a job or something happened to you. It's about the comeback. All great movies have a great comeback. So what's our story going to be? Is it going to be that we were just taking the punches or are we going to. Is it going to be about us getting back into the center of the ring and start delivering the punches ourselves? The comeback, that's what it's about. So don't give up. Even when you think that there is nothing, there's no money. There's not. This. As long as you wake up tomorrow morning, there's a chance. There is a chance. It's just like baseball. If, if you're still in the game and you can get in the batter's box, we may be able to score a run. Anything is possible. So put that ball in play. So make those phone calls or connect with people, but just don't give up. Be relentless. We have one shot at this, right? That's it. And then for eternity, we're just a headstone. So let's just have some fun. Don't give up. Be. Be positive. And one of the things that I've learned too is I don't know that much about my great, great, great grandparents and I'm sure they were hard working, driven people, but I want that. My. I want that. I want my great, great grandkids to think that there was a guy named Daryl and boy, this guy overcome adversity. And generationally, the story of me just gets passed down. And just like anybody else, we. We're only human. We're all going to run into adversity, but it's about how we overcome adversity. We're all going to hit rock bottom, but it's all about finding the ladder and climbing out of that space. That's what it's about. [00:43:15] Speaker B: Yes. Incredible. Daryl, thank you for sharing your story so openly today. It's. It's going to change a lot of. A lot of lives. And I have no doubt about that. Your. Your honesty and strength are a reminder that resilience is. It's not about having all the answers. It's about continuing forward even when the path is uncertain. And you've done just that. [00:43:40] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:43:41] Speaker B: Thank you. [00:43:41] Speaker A: And just never give up. [00:43:44] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah. [00:43:45] Speaker A: You know, don't tap out. [00:43:47] Speaker B: Just keep. Keep going forward, keep keeping on. If there's one thing I hope listeners take away from this conversation. It's that many of the strongest people we know are carrying battles we may never see. So provide a little bit more compassion because you never know what someone else might be going through. So a little more awareness as well can truly make a difference. Thank you for listening to this podcast. It is awareness the podcast. If this episode resonated with you, consider sharing it with someone who might need it. Until next time, take care of yourselves and each other. For the great producer, Mike My name is Rob Daniels. We'll see you in the next episode. [00:44:30] Speaker A: Sam.